Sexual Satisfaction In A Relationship Depends on Female Orgasm

Making A Woman Come Is Good For Both Partners!

Over the years many studies have been conducted about women’s sexual satisfaction, and the factors that affect it. For example, Michael Young and his colleagues sent a 70 item questionnaire to several hundred women in relationship with men. From the responses, they were able to understand some of the factors that can change a woman’s  perceptions of sexual satisfaction and pleasure.

They discovered there were a few variables that counted for most of the variation sexual satisfaction among these women. So, to start with, what affects sexual satisfaction is not only about sex: it’s also about non-sexual aspects of the relationship. These include a woman’s overall level of satisfaction with the relationship. And also whether or not a woman reaches orgasm during lovemaking, as well as how often lovemaking takes place. Interestingly enough, these factors also include a woman’s enjoyment of sexual activity above and beyond sexual intercourse.

Unsurprisingly, perhaps, Young discovered that sexual satisfaction is directly related to overall relationship satisfaction. No surprise there, for anyone who has done any work on sexual pleasure and orgasmic frequency with couples will know that when a relationship’s in difficulty, sex is the first thing to disappear from the couple’s agenda.

What this means is that the frequency of sex between a couple is a barometer of the health of the relationship.

There is also a lot of evidence to suggest that sexual satisfaction is directly related to emotional closeness and a feeling of intimacy between two relationship partners.  

Also, and again unsurprisingly, overall sexual satisfaction depends on a high level of sexual functioning – which means achieving orgasm consistently.

Again this doesn’t seem like rocket science, because many of us would feel dissatisfied with sex which didn’t result in orgasm. That’s despite the fact that many women claim the feeling of emotional closeness they get during sex is sufficient reward even without an orgasm.

Even so, it seems that sexual activity which often leads to the woman having an orgasm is directly linked to higher levels of  satisfaction and happiness.

Furthermore, there is a direct correlation between a man’s ability to make a woman come, his interest in bringing a woman to orgasm, and his knowledge about how to give a woman an orgasm, and the overall sexual satisfaction woman in a relationship.

So good sex isn’t just about having orgasms – it’s also about how often you have orgasms! Women and men alike who had a higher frequency of sexual activity reported higher levels sexual satisfaction.

What about the other variables?

Sexual satisfaction also depends on participation in sexual activities that don’t involve sexual intercourse. This actually means oral sex, anal sex and masturbation. 

Interestingly enough, but perhaps again not surprisingly, sexual satisfaction is related to age as well. This is an indication of the greater experience and knowledge we have about how to achieve orgasm as we get older, and perhaps also indicates a reduced sense of inhibition, shame or guilt around sex as we age.

Sidebar – The G Spot

A lot of research has demonstrated that no more than 15% of women reach orgasm during intercourse.

Of course, a lot of women are satisfied with sexual intercourse even if they don’t experience orgasm. But what’s missing from scientific studies? Well, maybe the awareness that there are many ways for a woman to reach orgasm. Indeed, every woman’s body contains many spots which, when stimulated, can result in sexual pleasure and help make her come. 

It’s up to the man and woman to find those erogenous zones, and use them to elicit sexual pleasure – and the satisfaction which follows. When the man is caring enough to find out how to bring a woman to orgasm, a couple will find that sexual satisfaction will increase. So will orgasm frequency and the quality of the relationship, and also their desire for sex. This is a positive feedback loop which works to the benefit of everyone. One of those spots is the G spot.

As we’ve observed elsewhere on this site Ernst Grafenberg was one of the first researchers to confirm there is an erogenous zone on the anterior wall of the vagina where the urethra runs alongside the vagina.

This is an area easily stimulated by finger or penis. The female urethra is surrounded by erectile tissue. This erectile tissue swells up into the area called the G spot. This consists of sensitive tissue which helps a woman reach orgasm when it’s stimulated.

Grafenberg also observed that at the moment of orgasm, clear liquid can be expelled in large quantities from a woman’s urethra. He concluded this was made up of secretions from the glands around the urethra in the vaginal wall.

In man on top sex, the penis rarely stimulates the vaginal G spot directly unless the angle of the male erection is very steep, or the woman alters the positions of her legs, for example by putting her feet on the shoulders of her partner.

Grafenberg observed that rear entry sex was a better way to stimulate the G spot. He referred to it as the anterior vaginal wall and explained how it could make a woman come during intercourse. He observed that “the eroticising effect of rear entry sex is very great, as in this position both partners’ most sensitive areas are brought into closest contact – i.e. the anterior vaginal wall and the glans penis.”